Laughing, Weeping, Living

Life happens. You laugh about it or cry about it, sometimes both.

All the Doctors and Nurses

And Nurse Practitioners and Social Workers and assorted Therapists.

Sydney knitted a beautiful prayer shawl, which we kept in Agnes' bed.

Sydney knitted a beautiful prayer shawl, which we kept in Agnes’ bed.

Agnes had a huge impact on many departments at Akron Children’s Hospital. I think there were only a couple units that had no dealings with her. On Friday as we were reflecting on Agnes’ life and preparing for her end of life, I began a list of all the people who have cared for Agnes throughout her life. I only wish I could remember everyone; there are many faces I can see in my memory, but I don’t know the names anymore. My family was so blessed by the sensitivity and concern of the PICU staff during Agnes’ final days. We are especially thankful for the nurses who spent shift after shift caring for Agnes during her final admission, particularly Eric and Kathy.

100_2019All 173 names I can remember before memory fails:

Katie, Maria, Nicole, Colleen, Lori, Kristen, Missy, Molly, Sarah, Susan, Linda, Allison, Kristi, Denise, Helena, Marlene, Denise, Hannah, Heather, Katy, Eric, John, Betsy, Matthew, Earline, Jackie, Betty, Susan, Reyhanna, Chris, Mary, Ashley, Jessica, Anna, Josh, Carrie, Laura, Kathy, Melissa, Karen, Tracey, Megan, Kristen, Vicki, Joanna, Megan, Dawn, Chelsea, Leanne, Amy, Lisa, Taryn, Elizabeth, Kari, Christian, Tara, Laurie, Ashley, Kayla, Julie, Kaylee, Chris, Nate, Rebecca, Julia, Christian, Wade, Brenda, Angela, Melissa, Zach, Jennifer, Angie, Ralph, Leah, Jennifer, Penny, Darla, Linda, Alyssa, Karli, Bridget, Amber, Lois, Christine, Amber, Cathy, Hannah, Carrieann, Amy, Karah, Melissa, Tammy, Kelly, Melissa, Joe, Beth, Melissa, Ann-Marie, Julie, Lisa, Sofya, Cathy, Tatiana, Kelly, Heather, Samantha, Joanne, Karen, Kevin, Tracey, Holly, Jenna, Caroline, Nancy, Leslie, Usha, Michael, Cathy, Dave, Mona, Mike, Emily, Jennifer, Marc, John, Tsulee, Kim, Cortney, Ryan, Chris, Urmila, Maria, Jim, Heather, Roger, Debbie, Vivek, Cassandra, Mark, Alison, Rajeev, Starla, John, Robert, Tim, Todd, John, Christine, Ted, Melissa, Gregory, Todd, Haynes, Scott, Becky, C.R., Vivek, John, Samantha, Wassim, Jaime, Elizabeth, Cooper, Jessica, Danielle, Stephen, Ibrahim, Andrew, Leslie, Patrick, Diana, Lauren…

Agnes' final footie sleeper. So perfect.

Agnes gets dressed to meet Jesus in a perfect footie sleeper.

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What I Wore Sunday: October 20

Hi there. Linking up with Fine Linen and Purple.

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Stephen noticed we were taking pictures

Stephen noticed we were taking pictures

He wants to be in the picture.

He wants to be in the picture.

He wants to make sure you noticed Mommy's boots.

He wants to make sure you noticed Mommy’s boots.

My outfit today is a great example of “use what you have.”

The shirt is a Motherhood Maternity shirt I bought when pregnant with Agnes. I actually don’t recommend this shirt because the fabric is very thin, and the shirt shrank a lot in the wash. You would have to air dry, I think, because even low heat in the dryer was too much. The price was too much for that kind of shirt.

The sweater vest thingy was in a bag of free clothes someone gave me when pregnant with Stephen. I love to layer this over long sleeves in the fall and winter. It’s just enough of a layer to get through those days that aren’t quite cold, but still rather chilly.

The skirt is seriously something I have had in my closet for more than 10 years. It still fits (yay, stretchy!) and more miraculously, the elastic waistband is not trashed despite over 10 years of normal wear and wash. It is Merona from Target, so I guess I highly recommend. I believe I wore this skirt as my concert black and white in high school choir.

Also, today I got to wear my pretty new Clarks boots. Yay for fall!

Another Sunday without Agnes at church. She is doing much better the past couple days, so I did have a positive attitude when folks were like, “where’s your baby?” I also had the freedom to sing with the choir today and it was good that I was there. The lady who leads the choir is on vacation this week and next week! Anna let me start off the troparion and it went pretty well. The scary part was when one of the other ladies who kind of leads the sopranos had to run home in the middle of the liturgy! I’m still not totally comfortable with the music of the liturgy, so I was pretty nervous until she came back. We did pretty well, all things considered, and like I said it was good that I was there!

As for the rest of my day, it was pretty good. We hung out with Agnes for a while and Stephen played with all the PICU nurses. He’s a little charmer, and all the nurses and doctors think he is just adorable. Agnes’ nurse today said, “He is the cutest; I could just eat him up.” You better watch out, Stephen. I also spent a long time in the kitchen with Stephen, cooking a pot of chili for dinner with a pan of cornbread on the side. Stephen helped by standing on his little step stool and commenting that the pots are “hot.” He also stuck stickers to the kitchen floor. I asked him what he wanted for dinner because I knew he didn’t want chili, and his answer was, “macaroni.” I asked “macaroni with cheese, or with tomato sauce?” and he said, “cheese tomato sauce!” That’s just because he repeats everything. He doesn’t really understand about answering questions 100% of the time. So I assumed he meant like the blue box macaroni, and he was pretty happy to eat that for dinner. So, I cooked a pot of chili, a pan of cornbread, and a box of macaroni and cheese for myself and Stephen. Good thing we like leftovers up in here.

Anyway, thanks for reading, and if you’re in the mood for a real Agnes update, check in again tomorrow because her care is really going down tomorrow. She’s getting an echocardiogram and they may switch the ventilator to the CPAP plus pressure support setting tomorrow. Wooo. Big day. In the meantime, go here to see a great picture of me stuffed into the backseat of our tiny car with two car seats and an oxygen tank.

Check out Fine Linen and Purple for more Sunday fashions.

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