Laughing, Weeping, Living

Life happens. You laugh about it or cry about it, sometimes both.

Baby Alice

on August 1, 2014

Next week we were going to happily announce that a new baby Schwager is on the way. Instead, today I announce with sadness that our new baby Schwager has miscarried. We have named her Alice. She was very, very little when she died, so we decided to endow her with a female name since her actual gender was unknown. Alice is a family name on my father’s side, and I have always thought it was a very pretty name. Perfect for our new little baby saint.

We are very sad to lose yet another child; just to recap our baby survival rate right now is 25 percent. I don’t really want to be that family who is such an example, bearing trials with such grace. I don’t want to need all this grace we get from having three little baby saints in heaven praying for our particular needs and intentions. Why do we have to be purified so thoroughly here on earth? I would be happy to do it in purgatory if it meant I could keep my babies.

Since I have now had two miscarriages, my doctors and I will do some investigation to see if there is something medical that is causing me to lose pregnancies. On the one hand, I hope there is a medical reason, because it might be treatable and then I can have a successful pregnancy with a healthy baby. On the other hand, a medical reason for repeated miscarriages can potentially be serious. I don’t really want to come away from this investigation with a newly diagnosed disease.

So while we continue grieving our children, and investigating medical possibilities, we rely on their prayers.

Baby Joseph Mary, pray for us. Baby Agnes, pray for us. Baby Alice, pray for us.

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6 responses to “Baby Alice

  1. I also have two Angel Babies. I had a medical issue where my body didn’t produce a hormone to sustain the pregnancy. I was able to be on a hormone supplement to keep the pregnancy and now have an 18 month old baby girl. It is better to find out if there is something causing this than to keep putting yourself through the heartache. A distant friend of a relative went through 25 losses before finally having a successful pregnancy. Nothing is impossible keep your head up! If you need words of encouragement or just need to express your feelings to a kindred spirit there is a page on my blog called personal questions that are sent to me privately. You will be in my thoughts and prayers!

  2. JeneaSwainston says:

    My dearest Niece and Nephew…I am unable to express anything that will help at this time. I love you so much. Continued prayers for strength.
    Love and hugs, Aunt Jenea

  3. I’m profoundly sorry for your loss. May the Theotokos comfort you and may Alice’s memory be eternal.

  4. Laura says:

    Oh Judy, I am so, so sad to hear of the loss of your baby. I will keep you and her and all your family in my prayers. Tomorrow is the anniversary of my miscarriage, so it is a sad weekend for us, and I will be gathering your grief into my prayers too. Peace and healing your way.

  5. Amy Seymour says:

    Oh, Judy, another heartache for you to bear! I’m so sorry for all your trials and tribulations. I’ll pray for the intercession of St. Catherine of Siena (patron saint against miscarriages) that you will conceive again soon and be blessed with a healthy, happy, and ultimately, holy child.

  6. Rebecca Wood says:

    I am sorry for your loss. You are in my thoughts and prayers. Sending a lot of love always.

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